Stuff in my head

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Computer Humour and Joke Telling PC’s

When I was finishing up my last post which is mostly a bunch of blather about my computer, I was thinking a little joke about computer might be a nice way to end up. When nothing came to mind, beyond those old classics like:

A woman calls a computer help line to asks the operator “Where is the ‘any’ key?”

Ok, that one can be told better but the point is, I decided to check if google had any new jokes. And while google can’t actually tell you new jokes, I found out that there is a computer that has been designed to tell witty jokes based on the connections between two words. A couple examples:

I like my women like I like my gas…. natural

I like my relationships like I like my source…. open

And one that could only come from a computer:

I like my men like I like my monoxide…. odourless

Anyway, though it sounds really interesting, it’s obviously limited to “I like my something like I like my something” jokes. The computer from there analyses what third word fits both and creates the joke. Read the Telegraph’s article for the more.


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They really did ask some great questions back in the day, and they really did speak well. By well I mean slowly and considered. Just watch this. Bertrand Russell.

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I Built My Own Computer

So I built my own computer. From parts, obviously, so I guess I should say assembled but whatever. Anyway, it’s a desktop computer and the cool thing about desktops, especially ones you built yourself, is that you can upgrade them!

My current specs are:

  • 8Gb Ram
  • Intel Core i5 (quad core)
  • 128Gb Hard Drive (Solid State)

With all that ram and the quad cores on top of solid state memory, the machine is pretty fast. I actually put it together a few months back and am thinking about doing a little tinkering.

At the time I was quite busy and gaming was the last thing on my mind and I had no interest in it at all. However, since then, I have cut back on work hours and developed a small interest in gaming, which started out because I found there were games you could play online, free! Games such as BattleForge.

The thing about these games is they are taxing on a standard graphics card. In fact, I don’t even have a graphics card, it’s built into the Intel Core i5. But there is room on the motherboard for a graphics card and I’d be really interested in seeing the difference in how these online games run with upgraded graphics.

I’m also pondering upgrading my CPU to the i7 version but I think the first thing, seeing as the CPU doesn’t seem to be working very hard at all at the moment, is to get the graphics card. Don’t you love technology!

I realise it’s not the best in the world but I do love my computer and how smooth it runs. Anyone else proud of their computer? What are your specs?

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Great Lessons to Be Learnt From These Age Specific Quotes

I came across a page of 100 quotes applying to different ages we pass through as we grow older and hopefully, wiser. Here are a few of my favorites from the page:

  • People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one.
    Leo J. Burke
  • A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn’t act that way very often.
  • Nature gives us twelve years to develop a love for our children before turning them into teenagers.
    William Galvin (paraphrased)
  • Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
    Bob Hope
  • The really frightening thing about middle age is the knowledge that you’ll grow out of it.
    Doris Day
  • Men do not quit playing because they grow old; they grow old because they quit playing.
    Oliver Wendell Holmes

See the rest here.

Oh, and the lessons to be learnt? Enjoy life because it flies by!

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Do Kids Learn Anything at School?

Ok, obviously they do. They learn math, science, history, geography, etc, etc. But I have been reading some stuff that ignited a spark that has been smoldering in the back of my mind for some time; that schools aren’t so much education facilities as they are worker factories.

Kids don’t really learn all that much at school. Seriously, beyond the ability to read, write and do some basic sums, what else did you “learn” at school that you still have with you and use to this day. Most of what school is about is the ability to study, remember and pass a test. And once you have passed the test, you are generally free to forget everything and move on with the next subject.

If you want to turn your kid into a great worker, send them to the worker factory, a.k.a. school. Here’s a few minutes of George Carlin (R.I.P.), the late and great thinking man’s comedian as he breaks the school system down for you.


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Teaching Kids the Right Way – Things I want to teach my kids

I was bumbling around and found a site Penelope Trunk’s site, specifically this post about motivation. I thought it was a good one. Of course, there are things I agree with and things I don’t. The article talks about letting kids learn what they want to learn. A fantastic concept but one that I think, in reality, isn’t going to work all the time. Surely there are things you want to teach your children that they don’t want to learn.

Reading more posts in the Home Schooling section of that site gives some great ideas that I would love to bring to my children and their learning. But still, I don’t think I can afford to home school them, as great as that sounds and as terrible as schools are starting to look, once you have your eyes opened.

Let kids learn what they want to learn. Look to see what interests them and how they start to learn about it and yourself learn from that. How do your kids learn? Use that.

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Handling Regret – Things I want to teach my kids

I’m sitting here trying to get some work done and from out of nowhere a memory I am ashamed of burst into my head. Other times when this memory has burst into my head, I have had physical reactions to the memory. My cheeks and ears burned red and my head dropped down in shameful regret.

This regretful action wasn’t anything illegal. It was something I said at a party when I was new to alcohol that caused the other person, who came up to introduce himself to me, to stand there speechless for a moment then having nothing else to say, to walk away and never speak to me again. It wasn’t offensive, racist, sexist or bad what I said, but it put a wall up and when I remember the moment I regret it.

Today however, instead of looking down and reliving the personal shame, I looked up and shook my head at how young and stupid I was. And this is something I want to eventually teach my kids (I don’t have children as of yet).

You will do stupid stuff. You will do things you regret. But don’t relive every failure and shame yourself into thinking you are a lesser person. Learn from these failures. Laugh at the stupidity and realise you have learnt how not to do something and that next time you will have more success.