graphiteSteve

Stuff in my head


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Computer Humour and Joke Telling PC’s

When I was finishing up my last post which is mostly a bunch of blather about my computer, I was thinking a little joke about computer might be a nice way to end up. When nothing came to mind, beyond those old classics like:

A woman calls a computer help line to asks the operator “Where is the ‘any’ key?”

Ok, that one can be told better but the point is, I decided to check if google had any new jokes. And while google can’t actually tell you new jokes, I found out that there is a computer that has been designed to tell witty jokes based on the connections between two words. A couple examples:

I like my women like I like my gas…. natural

I like my relationships like I like my source…. open

And one that could only come from a computer:

I like my men like I like my monoxide…. odourless

Anyway, though it sounds really interesting, it’s obviously limited to “I like my something like I like my something” jokes. The computer from there analyses what third word fits both and creates the joke. Read the Telegraph’s article for the more.

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Great Lessons to Be Learnt From These Age Specific Quotes

I came across a page of 100 quotes applying to different ages we pass through as we grow older and hopefully, wiser. Here are a few of my favorites from the page:

  • People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one.
    Leo J. Burke
  • A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn’t act that way very often.
    Unknown
  • Nature gives us twelve years to develop a love for our children before turning them into teenagers.
    William Galvin (paraphrased)
  • Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
    Bob Hope
  • The really frightening thing about middle age is the knowledge that you’ll grow out of it.
    Doris Day
  • Men do not quit playing because they grow old; they grow old because they quit playing.
    Oliver Wendell Holmes

See the rest here.

Oh, and the lessons to be learnt? Enjoy life because it flies by!


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Finding Happiness

I read a little aphorism that went:

We wage war on others when we’re not at peace with ourselves.

For a lot more fluffy wisdom like this, go here.

I thought this sounded ok, but what really got me thinking was the last four words. At peace with ourselves. Inner peace. Happiness. How can we find it?

The truth is, only you can bring yourself happiness. You have to accept yourself for who and what you are and then you can find happiness.

Try removing those things that leave us feeling lesser – Lust; Greed; Envy; Pride; and see if you can find happiness within yourself.

Because it’s true that we do seem to tie a lot of our happiness into what we have compared to others. We want more and think this will bring us happiness. We want more than our neighbors and think this will make us happy. But just imagine if you were suddenly happy with what you have now! Wouldn’t that be a weight off your shoulders?  But then you might think this sounds like a great ploy to keep people down – keep the poor people poor.

“Don’t try to better yourself! Accept who you are and find happiness!”

But perhaps you can accept who you are and what you have but still try to be a better you. Or a richer you. (Are they the same thing?)

Can be happy with who you are and what you have but still have ambition to grow?


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Stop the government taking control of a public tool – the internet.

Do you love the internet? I do, and I love the way we can get any information we want whenever we want.

Thanks to things like google we can find things so easily. Thanks to people putting in huge amounts of time that information is there. Thanks to thousands of people, resources like wikipedia work, but also there are smaller private sites that provide great information. And there is a lot of other great things about the internet as it is at the moment.

It is a free, open, wonderful place (admittedly there is a lot of stuff you may not want your kids to see but I wouldn’t have it any other way)

What freaks me out is when governments try to get involved. Do we really need the internet to be policed? That scares me. Even though I don’t think I am a contributor to what causes trouble, and am sure my site would be fine, there are way too many problems with having the government come and have power over the internet, behind the scenes where us normal users never get to see.

Check this out – http://publicknowledge.org/act-now